Recently I heard stories from several friends of mine about how their businesses are thriving.  Two friends who are coaches have practices that are growing like crazy as they help more and more people, and another friend in PR is chocker-block with happy new clients.

If we let it, most news will have us feeling bad in no time. And I have to confess, I have not been immune of late.   But as the Rev. Michael Beckwith says, we can also see negative news stories as prayer requests.  So I’m on a campaign, starting with me, and now maybe you too, to send those prayers, and let the positive stories remind me that we absolutely can create and share abundance at any time.

I invite you to use this space to share inspirational stories of those who have created their own personal experiences of abundance. But be careful, it’s catchy!

I started listening the beginning of December and did great for 3 weeks or so. I wasn’t so much focused on good foods and bad, but only eating when I was hungry. I truly felt like a naturally slender person and it felt great. I have been 5 - 20 pounds overweight since maybe 12 or 13 years old and have always wanted to shed this weight and be like “everyone else”…or so I thought. Never a big fan of exercise but I’ve done Weight Watchers several times, losing about half of my “goal” weight loss and then stopping the program. I started listening again this week after a small weight gain - and more disturbing to me- being obsessed with food. Always grazing….and never listening to whether or not my body was truly hungry. Every morning I hoped to do it differently but gee, it was end of March and that still hadn’t happened. I found myself feeling very angry listening to those early podcasts - and even felt anger when I was downloading and saw THREE new podcasts about exercise. Something inside of me was very angry!

As I was listening on my way to work yesterday about a “part of me” not really wanting to be naturally slender, I dismissed it and thought “that’s not me” just as I did the first I time I heard it in December. But I tried to think about it anyway…and much to my surprise my eyes were opened!! And I am so excited I just can’t wait to tell you!

I grew up in family where weight and bodies were very important. My mother was very slender - and my father preferred her that way and my father also always had his weight under control. There were always comments and jokes about larger people. Both of my parents when in their 40’s were into jogging and staying phsycially fit. My older brothers as well were into track and field, and only dated girls who were also phsycially fit. I hate to say it but an overweight girl did not meet their standards. So here I am, child #3 and daughter #1 with a controlling mother and an alcoholic father and I begin gaining weight at age 12 or 13. And I feel somewhat…..unacceptable to my family. (No one taught me to eat differently and I’m not sure that would’ve helped regardless) I felt “shamed” by my family that I was overweight and probably was an embarassment to them. I got the message that good people were slim and exercised. If you didn’t love to exercise you were lazy. And the exercise wasn’t “activity” you enjoyed, it was for the purpose of being “good” and “disciplined”.

To continue, as I go through my teen age years with a controlling mother I struggled to be independent of her thinking and views - and I don’t think I was quite free of that struggle until I was about 30 years old. So…….if I were to lose this weight and become naturally slender, wouldn’t I become what THEY wanted - or want - me to be? Wouldn’t I be giving up my independence and sense of self that I worked so hard in therapy and groups to gain? If I became naturally slender, how would I feel when those comments about the “nicer looking body” or whatever were made? I would cringe inside at the thought of my body finally being “acceptable” to them as I want to be acceptable to myself without allowing myself to even THINK about the “standards” of others. And wouldn’t I feel I had “lost” myself? So what am I getting out of holding onto these 5 - 15 pounds?? I guess I am holding onto my sense of self by “not conforming” to my family.

Renee, this makes so much sense to me - and I hope it does to you! I know I have a lot further to go with this, but I was hoping it might help other IOWLer’s in their struggles. I wish I would’ve read something like this, it would’ve helped me so much. Feel free to use my little breakthrough story however you would like - and thank you for your work and your girft to the world!!

Mary

I’ve just finished a seven part series on Easy Exercise Motivation (that’s a record for IOWL!), and I’d love to hear how its affected your exercise routine.

Are you moving more?

Are you lazy and proud of it?

Have you “chunked down” what qualifies as a workout?

I’d love to hear! Post a comment to share.

Dear Renee,

I want to thank you for your courage in returning to IOWL.  I have been listening to your podcast since October and with the tools you have given me, I have made enormous progress in my weight and depression struggle, which has since become a weight and depression loss (Ha!) journey.  Even though I feel I can achieve my goals with the podcasts I have, I know you still have a lot to teach and I am an eager student.  Yesterday I set my intention to let go of the “I shoulds” or “I have to’s” that created a list a mile long.  I further set my intention to enjoy the present and appreciate what I can accomplish, rather than focus on what didn’t get done.  I took my dog for a walk and re-listened to the episode on changing limiting beliefs.  It could not have been more relevant to my intention.  I realized that these shoulds and have to’s were the albatross around my neck creating inner conflict.  Nothing says inner conflict like “I’ve go to do ______” because inherent in that statement is the notion that I really don’t want to do it!  Well I’ve decided that whenever an “I should” or “I have to” enters my mind, I will either replace it with an “I want to” or at the very least “I am willing to” and if I can’t then I need to renew my spirit before revisiting the things that need attention. 

Like you, I am an admirer of Oprah.  I particularly like Peter Walsh’s segments on getting organized.  Between your podcast and Peter’s segments, yesterday I realized a strong parallel between my own inner conflict and the challenge to keep up with other aspects of my home and work life.  Peter suggests that clutter robs you of motivation and enjoyment in your home which should be a sanctuary.  He couldn’t be more right.  Much of my inner conflict used to rise from the struggle to lose weight, but I feel now that struggle is an easy weight loss journey and I look forward to extending that feeling to the care of my environment.  Just as I can’t expect to eat healthfully and exercise one day a week and see results, neither can I do housework one day a week and ignore my home’s well being the other 6 days.  I recently advised someone on the Yahoo group that real change in one’s body and health is the sum of small efforts, and I plan to approach the care of my house and work environment in that same way.  My environment and my body are both expressions of my state of mind.  I used to see a messy kitchen full of dirty dishes right after I cleaned it as further evidence that I cannot keep up with my housekeeping.  I now see it as evidence of fresh meals made at home and enjoyed as a family, not as a personal failure.  

Renee you have truly brought ease and joy to my weight loss journey, but that’s secondary to the fullness I now have in the rest of my life.  I could not convey in one email how grateful I am to you, so I intend to spread my joy to all those I encounter as an expression of my gratitude.  

Best wishes!

Jenn

I am glad to say that I am in a good place and have been “binge free” for sometime now.  I still really can’t say exactly how it happened, but there was a “shift” in my thinking which led to major changes in my behavior.
 

I am not sure if we really got into my obsession with frozen yogurt in any of our conversations, but for the past 25+ years I have been OBSESSED with eating frozen yogurt.  I have been eating at least one a week and always get a fairly large size.  I know every yogurt store in So. Cal and always plan my Saturday nights out around being close to one of my favorite “fro yo” stores.  After eating a medium or large yogurt I would get gassy, bloated and constipated the next morning.  I was never really able to stand back and pass on a yogurt to not have to experience all the side effects.  Like anyone addicted to anything I only cared about eating a yogurt with no regard for the pains I felt afterward.

About 3 months or so ago I decided to eliminate most dairy from my diet and see how I felt.  Although the thought of not having my frozen yogurt was daunting, however I decided to give it a go.  Lo and behold I felt so much better….less gas, bloat and overall I felt so much better.   I am very aware of what I put in my mouth and always felt like dairy was a problem for me.  I was aware of  all the chemicals that are put into the yogurt (but didn’t seem to care.)  I am happy to tell you that I have not had a yogurt in months and ready for the best part……I am NOT struggling with any type of regret, sadness or deprivation.  I cannot tell you how amazing this is for me.  I drive by yogurt stores without even the slightest second thought.  If someone would have told me that I would not have eaten a frozen yogurt in months and not cared, I would have never believed them.  As I said in the beginning there was a shift that occured in my thinking.

I am grateful for my time with you and the changes I have made.  The changes are not about diet, deprivation or willpower.  What has happened is completely different.  I do have my “moments” and give into a craving, but have made dramatic improvements from 6 months ago.  I am amazed over what has happened.  Quite simply, Thank you.

 Sincerely,

Melissa

One listener shares her “lifestyle change” struggles and how Inside Out Weight Loss is helping her to conquer them:

Dear Renee,

I can’t quite believe how long it took me to find your podcast! If I had this at the beginning of my lifestyle change (refuse to call it a diet–ever! The word DIE in it is a bit off-putting haha), my journey would have been rich instead of a struggle.  I’m not saying it’s been an up-hill battle but neither has it been effortless.  At times, it was actually easy but I had a nagging feeling I was missing something.  I’ve successfully lost 56 pounds on my plan and I’m so proud.  But recently, I’ve had episodes where I ‘cheated’ by overeating.  I was so good for over 6 months (through HOLIDAYS) and suddenly I had THREE episodes where I stumbled. IT was the usual cycle of self-criticism, guilt, guilt, guilt, and even more guilt.  I tend to have the mentality where everything has to be perfect or it’s an utter failure.  But that’s where you come in! I’ve listened to the Prologue and the first 13 episodes and I’ve come up with some startling realizations.  It wasn’t easy but I felt such a release when I finally got it.  I’m not saying I understand fully but the fact that I’m evolving is such a great experience.  In fact, I just wrote a little about it in my weight loss support blog, I thought I’d share it with you:

”
Good Gosh! Holy Macro!

Don’t mind the title, I’ve been revamping my ‘foul’ language per my mom’s request.  I have a impressionable 7-year old sister and I sure don’t want her to learn anything from me that isn’t appropriate lol!Anyhoo, I’ve had a few rough patches in the last few weeks, with the cheating and stuff but I’ve learned not to beat myself up about it.  It’s been such a learning experience and I realized that these episodes had a really deep meaning behind it.  I guess you could say I had an Epiphany.  It was quite painful but now I’m working through it.  I can’t believe how much I’ve repressed and it manifested in my overeating/binging.  It also showed up in dozens of little ways.  I couldn’t have gotten to these realizations without the help of a little gem of a podcast! Every time I listen, I feel re energized and I can feel my thought process change.  I even started keeping a journal and I write in it every night and every time I listen to each episode.  It’s no ordinary podcast where it tells/lectures you on how to diet but how to make lasting changes within yourself in order to maintain a lifelong weight loss.  I definitely recommend it to everyone who is struggling.  I take time every morning and night just for myself–and listen to an episode or two.  I write down my thoughts and answer her questions and came up with some startling realizations.  I could go on and on and just rave about it but I want to share this with all of you.  Here is the link:  Inside Out Weight Loss
It’s totally free and I think we all should utilize everything within our grasp.  This journey is NOT an easy one but we could make it effortless by gradually changing our thought process and how our body works.  If you do start listening, make sure to start from the Prologue and do it in order! I’m only at episode 13 and I believe there is 60+ episodes.

Anyways, back to my title.  I’ve actually had a horrendous dream last night.  It was one of those Cheating Dreams! In my dream, I was faced with three different cakes (all chocolate) and instead of picking ONE, I took half of all 3 and gobbled it down.  I actually woke up thinking that I had cheated and I felt so devastated, I was near tears.  This morning I’m actually exploring the meaning behind this dream and what my subconscious is telling me.  I’m not going all Buddah on you but this is my process of trying to cleanse myself of self-doubt, self-criticism, and self-sabotage.  And accept all 3 as part of me and the process of this lifestyle change.  I can’t even believe I’m actually doing this because although, I considered myself open-minded, I never really did anything to expand my in-depth self-awareness.  I knew my faults, in fact I was UBER aware of them.  But I realize that’s just another part of me self-criticizing.  It’s almost a relief to come to this realization.

Well, the intent of this post is to share what I’ve stumbled upon and bring more people to this wonderful podcast.  It truly is a helpful tool.  And to also purge myself of my horrendous dream and explore it.  Renee (host of Inside Out Weight Loss) always asks us to set an intent for every episode and I thought that was such a fantastic idea.  I’m up to Episode 13 and mine hasn’t change.  It’s “To live my life free of Yo-Yo dieting.  To BE and THINK like a Naturally Slender person. To make LASTING lifestyle changes that will create happiness within me.”

Thanks for reading!
Take Care and Stay OP!
Irrish ”

I just want to say, that with each podcast episode YOU ARE changing the world by helping US create peace and balance within us.  Keep up the great work, Renee!

-Irrish

I am happy to say that I have just recorded episodes 63 and 64. 

Episode 63 is a special episode - a kind of audio diary about the recent experiences that caused me to take this break in recording. I felt I had to acknowledge what has happened and share some of my early lessons and some of the gifts that I have already received from this very difficult time in my life.

Episode 64 is the next in the series on “Easy Exercise Motivation”.

 I can’t tell you how happy I am to be back!

PS If you are wondering why I am somewhat obscure in referring to what caused me to take this break, its because I signed a contract that prevents me from making any public comments.

Inside Out Weight Loss is on a short break, but will resume weekly episodes very soon.

We had some technical problems with episodes 63 and 64 which means I have to re-record them, and I’m taking a short break to re-center before I do.

In the meantime, I suggest you go back to the beginning and start again from there. There is a progression to this journey that sometimes is revealed in layers. And, you have 62 episodes to enjoy again! There’s a link to the right of this post to the show.

I will continue to post here on the blog anything that I think might be of interest. In fact, I have a few inspiring stories from listeners I will post shortly.

Blessings,

Renee

Tuesday, Feb 3rd, 2:00 pm
Dear Clients, Colleagues, Friends and the interested public.

I deeply appreciate the compassionate outpouring of support many of you have shown as I struggle through this most difficult time.

Now that I have had a few days to gather the courage, I would like to share with you where I truly stand. I too am utterly appalled by my husband’s behavior during the swap. I had not seen the footage until Friday night, so didn’t fully know how incredibly badly he had behaved until I saw it on national TV. I knew he was not proud of his behavior and that he had many misgivings. I did not know he had been aggressively cruel and insulting on so many levels. This has been impossible for me to comprehend.

While I completely condemn his behavior I feel confused because he has been a loving and dedicated husband and father for many years. This in no way can rationalize his inexcusable behavior. It is simply an explanation of why it has taken me this long to make a statement. I have asked Stephen to get professional help.

Finally, I know that I created offense as well. When I made the statement about the parents not having advanced degrees, I was responding to direct and probing questions from the director about what level of education I thought the Long’s had. I certainly don’t think people need college degrees to live intelligent and valuable lives, and was not passing any kind of judgment with my comment. My edited comment regarding being an American was actually an acknowledgement that being born here isn’t enough of a reason to be proud. We each need to make meaningful contributions that we are proud of and acknowledge other’s contributions as well. We create community and we try to live honorably and that is what makes us proud but it’s not our birthright. I am grateful to be a part of this country.

Again, thank you for your heartfelt comments.

Blessings,

Renee

Stephen wrote this of his own volition, without input from me. I offer it without comment.

I hope you will take this as a sincere and unequivocal apology. I have been completely taken aback by the response my behavior generated and it has taken a while for me to figure out what to say. I’m not doing this to try and redeem myself. Rather I’m trying to try and undo some of the hurt that people have obviously felt as a result of my comments.

Clearly I behaved like a complete jerk and I am deeply sorry for all the offense I have caused. I’m not going to hide behind excuses, I showed an extraordinary level of stupidity and arrogance. I will do my best to address most of the criticism directed at me. If I miss something out, however, it is not because I do not deem it important, it is just that there is rather a lot to cover.

First off, let me say I am deeply sorry for the terribly insulting way I treated Gayla during the show. She is a very pleasant person and clearly did not deserve to be treated that way. In fact, no one deserves to be treated that way. I was a bully, and it was just plain unacceptable. Once again, I offer my sincere apologies to Gayla, Alan, and their boys.

Some of my remarks obviously made me appear unpatriotic. Well that was just dumb. I chose to become a US citizen because I deeply respect the values upon which this great country is based. For the record, I think the US is an amazing country and I can’t think of anywhere I’d rather live. And while I do not happen to believe the Iraq war is a good idea, I do have a huge amount of respect for all the personnel who serve in the US military. They have the toughest job in the world and I am truly grateful for the sacrifices that they make to protect this country.

I used gross generalizations about Midwesterners and I am deeply sorry for any hurt I caused with these statements. My comments were just stupid and made me look like the one who is undereducated. Some of my best friends are Midwesterners, which shows how truly dumb my comments were.

I also deeply regret that my actions reflected badly on the environmental organizations with which I am affiliated, and were of disservice to the environmental movement as a whole. I’ve resigned both my nonprofit board positions and would ask you to not judge these organizations by my actions. I offer my sincere apologies to all the staff and board members.
Further, I regret that my remarks made me come across as a person who disrespects overweight people. I do not disrespect anyone for being overweight and I deeply regret that my remarks suggested I do. My wife has devoted her career to helping people and my comments reflect poorly on her and her heart-felt work. I apologize for my extreme insensitivity to her clients and her mission. Please don’t judge Renee by my actions.
I also want to apologize to my family and friends and thank them for their support, which I scarcely deserve. I believe we can all grow from experiences and I will work to ensure this experience teaches me to become a better, more compassionate person.

Finally I want to be clear that these are my words and I have received no input from anyone else, not even my wife. I hope this apology will be taken in the true spirit it was given.

Stephen